Got some funny jokes from my email, just want to share it with you all. You will never know when you need a laughter, enjoy.

KidsAreQuick
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TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA:
Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?

CLASS:
Maria.
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the

floor?
JOHN:
You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’

GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’

TEACHER: No, that’s wrong

GLENN:
Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD:
Yesterday you said it’s H to O.
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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we

didn’t have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!

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TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN:
Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ‘I.’
MILLIE: I is..

TEACHER: No, Millie….. Always say, ‘I am.’
MILLIE:
All right… ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’
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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s

cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his

father didn’t punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
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TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before

eating?
SIMON:
No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on ‘My Dog’ is exactly the same

as your brother’s. Did you copy his?
CLYDE :
No, sir.. It’s the same dog.
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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking

when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
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Teacher: Ah Kau, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how
much would your father still have?
Ah Kau: $10.
Teacher: You don’t know Maths.
Ah Kau: You don’t know my father la!



Mother: David, come here.
David: Yes, mum.
Mother: You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.
David: But but but….I will only get my report card tomorrow ???
Mother: I know that, but I’m going Hong Kong tomorrow so I’m scolding you
now.



Father: Why did you fail your Mathematics Test?
Son: On Monday, teacher said 3 + 5 = 8
Father: So?
Son: On Tuesday, she said 4 + 4 = 8.
On Wednesday, she said 6 + 2 = 8.
If she can’t make up her mind, how I know the right answer one ???



Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Yes Dear.
Girl: Would you die for me?
Boy: No la, mine is undying love only !!!



Man: How old is your father?
Boy: Same as me la.
Man: How can that be?
Boy: He only became a father when I  born lo !!!




Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son: That’s why I tell you she’s no good!



Teacher:  Where were you born?
Student:   Singapore , Sir.
Teacher:  Which part?
Student:   All of me ma….



A boy came home from school with his exam results.
‘ What did you get?’ asked his father.
‘ My marks are under water,’ said the boy.
‘ What do you mean ‘under water’?’
‘ They are all below ‘C’ (sea) level.’